impsTALK.co.uk | 2006/2007

On this page you can see the results from the 2006/2007 season, including any minute-by-minute or match reports, as well as all the news features and other various stuff published during the season. And, of course, a full season review.

2006/2007 Results and reports

2006/2007 saw impsTALK start a minute-by-minute match report thing. This was really nothing more sophisticated than some hapless impsTALK member listening to the absolutely God-awful matchLIVE! streaming commentary while scribbling some smart-arsed comments online. Like live blogging, just without the blog bit. It proved popular enough, particularly the coverage of Steve Evans' day out at Southwark Crown Court that attracted more than 50,000 visits during the day. If the game was covered, there will be a link next to the game below, along with links to any other related nonsense.

Date	Comp	Opponent	Result	Score	Report(s)
05/08	L2	Grimsby	L	2-3	Min-by-min
09/08	L2	Peterborough	L	0-1
12/08	L2	Darlington	W	4-1
19/08	L2	Shrewsbury	L	0-5
23/08	LC	Brighton	L	0-1	Min-by-min
26/08	L2	Franchise Fucksticks FC	L	0-1
September 2006
01/09	L2	Hartlepool	L	1-2
09/09	L2	Stockport	W	2-1	Min-by-min
12/09	L2	Barnet	D	3-3
16/09	L2	Accrington Stanley	L	1-2	Farmer Dan Highlights
23/09	L2	Rochdale	L	0-3	Min-by-min
27/09	L2	Lincoln City	L	4-1	Report
30/09	L2	Swindon Town	D	1-1	Min-by-min
October 2006
07/10	L2	Bristol	L	0-1
14/10	L2	Mansfield	D	1-1
17/10	AW	Brighton	L	0-2
21/10	L2	Bury	L	1-2
28/10	L2	Wycombe	L	0-1
November 2006
04/11	L2	Notts County	D	3-3
11/11	FAC1R	Bournemouth	L	0-4	Min-by-min
18/11	L2	Macclesfield	W	3-2
25/11	L2	Hereford	D	1-1
December 2006
05/12	L2	Chester	L	1-3	Min-by-min
09/12	L2	Wrexham	W	4-0
16/12	L2	Torquay	W	1-0
23/12	L2	Walsall	D	1-1
26/12	L2	Lincoln City	L	1-2
30/12	L2	Rochdale	L	0-4	Min-by-min
January 2006
01/01	L2	Barnet	W	2-1
06/01	L2	Accrington	W	1-0
13/01	L2	Stockport	L	0-2
20/01	L2	Swindon	L	1-3
27/01	L2	Walsall	D	1-1	Min-by-min
February 2007
03/02	L2	Grimsby	L	0-6	Min-by-min
10/02	L2	Darlington	L	0-2	Min-by-min
17/02	L2	Shrewsbury	L	0-3
20/02	L2	Peterborough	D	1-1
24/02	L2	Hartlepool	L	0-1
March 2007
03/03	L2	Franchise Fucksticks FC	L	2-3
10/03	L2	Bristol Rovers	W	2-1
17/03	L2	Mansfield	W	2-1
23/03	L2	Wycombe	D	0-0	Min-by-min
31/03	L2	Bury	L	0-1
April 2007
07/04	L2	Notts County	L	0-2
09/04	L2	Macclesfield	W	4-1
14/04	L2	Hereford	L	0-3
21/04	L2	Chester	W	1-0
28/04	L2	Torquay	D	1-1
May 2007
05/05	L2	Wrexham	L	1-3

Home games are shaded
L2 - League Two
FAC - FA Cup
LC -League Cup
AW - Auto Windscreens thing or whatever the hell they call it these days

2006/2007 News

2006/2007 was probably the most eventful season in the history on the club. This is how impsTALK saw it....

EVANS: ONLY CRAWLEY MATCHED STEVE EVANS' AMBITION
Steve Evans was today announced as manager of Crawley Town and immediately announced he would take the club where it belonged: embroiled in a messy, protracted legal battle in the High Courts while its players and staff literally starve to death on the streets...>>MORE

'Stay at home' Rodwell tells Staffsmart Stand
Cash-strapped Boston United have told the Staffsmart Stand to stay away from York Street until further notice – and more stands may follow, impsTALK can exclusively reveal in today’s breaking news exclusive breaking news update...>>MORE

CHAINED TO THE GOONS
To their absolute horror, Conference officials have been locked out of their OWN division tonight after stricken cheats Boston United broke in and claimed squatters rights, impsTALK can exclusively reveal in today’s breaking news breaking update...>>MORE

'....daddy?’
For one young Boston United fan, the end today was comprehensive, swift and brutal. At the final whistle at the Racecourse, and clutching his signed photo of Steve Evans’ boozy figure at Hayes in 2002, young Little Bobby Shattocks stood alone in solemn homage to his heroes - and the greatest manager in the history of world football....>>MORE

Accrington-Boston relations hit rock bottom as D-Day arrives
The Football League has expressed concern over a letter received from a captured Barnsley centre-forward today imploring them to dock relegation-threatened Accrington Stanley 24 points.... >>MORE

Urge Overkill
impsTALK urges BUFC players to stop urging other BUFC players to play well/cut out individual errors/bounce back from last week's disappointing defeat.....>>MORE

CHELSEA BAN CELERY, BOSTON BAN SALARIES
Just days after Premiership giants Chelsea banned Blues fans from taking celery into Stamford Bridge, Boston United’s mysterious new backers Standing Alone Ltd have unveiled a ban on SALARIES at the debt ridden Lincolnshire minnows...>>MORE

TAXI DRIVER
News that Boston United players and staff had to make their OWN way to today’s game at Field Mill in Mansfield was confirmed after eyewitnesses reported seeing Steve Evans in his new role as a taxi dispatcher this morning...> MORE

Evans' Sunday Night Fever
Sunday nights in the Evans household have taken a turn for the worse as Virgin Media’s bitter feud with BSkyB enters its third week, impsTALK can exclusively reveal in tonight’s breaking news exclusive update.... MORE>>

Boston ******
Embarrassed Boston officials were playing down the repossession of the ‘United’ part of the club’s name by bailiffs early this morning, claiming that they were never really that United anyway...MORE>>

Boston Town 2, Wellingborough 5
With Boston United playing away at Franchise Scumbags FC, it seemed fitting that impsTALK and its readers should dig deep and sponsor the matchball for Boston Town's home fixture with Wellingborough Town in the UCL Premier yesterday (March 3rd)... MORE>>

Boston United alphabet shortage
Boston United are running short of the letter 'L', impsTALK can exclusively reveal in today's Monday breaking news breaking exclusive update...MORE>>

Heeeere's Lennie!
At the end of the 2005/2006 season, impsTALK hound Adam Upsall met up with ex-Pilgrim Lennie Curtis. This interview originally appeared in the impsTALK fanzine, issue two...MORE>>

If Evans....
An occasional feature devoted to imagining our glorious leader as he might be in another profession.... MORE>>

Boston United Television
BUTV returns.......

Wreck draws crowds in Boston
Bostonians were the lucky beneficiaries of a once-in-a-lifetime free for all yesterday after they ransacked the quite dull and not-very valuable cargo of a sinking ship which was beached by salvagers in the town yesterday, impsTALK can exclusively reveal.

Evans hails arrival of 'greatest ever' excuse
Boston United’s calamitous capitulation at the hands of relegation fodder Rochdale at Spotland yesterday may have marked the nadir of a horrific year for Pilgrims fans, but for gaffer Steve Evans it was the perfect opportunity to unveil his latest signing – a near perfect excuse he has been working on for nearly a month.

Lincoln 2, Boston 1
Furious Boston United gaffer Steve Evans was left fuming after he was served TURKEY TWIZZLERS for his Christmas dinner – while Lincoln City staff tucked into prime roast turkey joints, and Evans wasted no time blaming the nutritionally destructive meal for defeat in the Yellow belly derby.

EXCLUSIVE! Lavaflow resubmit planning applications

COMPLETELY UNEXPECTED PLANNING CATASTROPHE DOOMS PILGRIMS
The very future of Boston United FC was dramatically, but totally unexpectedly, thrown into doubt this afternoon after the club’s plans for the LavaGiGADomE were unanimously thrown out by a special planning committee convened by Boston Borough Council.

It's Crazee Jimmy's Wheel of Blame!
Get those fingers pointing!

Investment deal 'close' as Crazee Jimmy sweats in Dragons' Den
Boston United jester Crazee Jimmy believes a deal to bring investment into his stricken cash cow is close, despite being told by BBC Dragon Deborah Meaden that his club ‘made Ted Bundy look like Santa Claus’ in a dramatic edition of Dragon’s Den filmed in London last week.

TARGET PRACTICE
Boston United club chairman Crazee Jimmy Rodwell, desperate to salvage whatever he can from his soon-to-be-liquidated cash cow, has announced the next home fixture with Hereford, if it happens, is to be designated as an official Fan Coin Throwing Day.

IT'S NOT BLUE, IT'S AQUA MARINE

MAYBE DREAMS DO COME TRUE? United striker Anthony Elding realises his ultimate footballing ambition by meeting the £60 fashion accessory, as modelled by impsTALK mole Adam Upsall prior to today's game against Notts County. Inspired by the soft, warm, luxurious feel of the garment, Elding went on to score one of United's three goals in the thrilling 3-3 draw

Evans in transfer list downloading shame
Boston United boss Steve Evans is facing possible action by local police after being caught OGLING the official player transfer list in a public toilet, and DOWNLOADING explicit lists of available teenage loan players on his office computer, impsTALK.co.uk can exclusively reveal.

Evans Releases Latest 'Top Five Bestest Friends in Football' Chart
BBC man Dalton this week's biggest faller.

DARLINGTON ANNOUNCE REDEVELOPMENT PLANS

APOCALYPSE SOON? Architect plans (above) depict sinister Darlington CEO Jon Sotnick destroying a village suspected of habouring rebel fighters in 2009

Crazee Jimmy announces 'Sweat With Steve' DVD
Last week’s startling revelation that Boston’s population is mostly comprised of sausage-roll chomping BUMBERLADAS who sweat GRAVY the moment they rise off the sofa has concerned many local figures, not least zany Pilgrims chairman Crazee Jimmy Rodwell.

PILGRIMS LAUNCH OFFICIAL ANTI-EVANS 'PROTEST PACKS'
Eager to cash in on the growing number of disaffected Pilgrims fans staying away from the Staffsmart Arena until tax conman Swagbag Steve Evans is fired, soon-to-be-liquidated Boston United have launched the all-new ‘Armchair Moaner Protest Pack’, courtesy of Crazee Jimmy’s World of Bargains.

(And just in case you were in any doubt: BBC interview with Farage)

'Morbid curiosity' expected to pull big audience
Ghoulish sightseers have long gorged themselves on explicit videos of beheadings, shooting, bombings, executions, shotgun suicides and huge nose tumours, but tomorrow they will have another horrorshow to feast their eyes on: Boston entertaining Lincoln City at the Staffsmart Arena™ (k.o 7.45pm).

Rodwell launches Boston United GOLD®
With the club in freefall, crowds non-existent and an Unsackable Swagbag Steve Evans clinging on for dear life, Boston United chairman Crazee Jimmy Rodwell has today announced an exciting new product for Pilgrims followers: Boston United GOLD!®

Video Interviews \| More… \| Signup
	Francis Green Relishing Lincoln Match 24-Sep-2006 impsTALK Press Officer Ralph Gackweed literally runs after Francis Green to mull over the slightly disappointing defeat at the hands of Rochdale, and look ahead to the forthcoming Yellowbelly derby, only to run out of breath and have to have a sit down on the kerb. Length 1 minute
	Stopper Marriott Relishing Lincoln Clash 24-Sep-2006 Press Officer Ralph Gackweed misses the rubbish Boston United keeper and so conducts his own interview using sock puppets in this *EXCLUSIVE* video. Download it now. Now. Now. Now. Now. Length 52 minutes
	Unsackable Swagbag Relishing Lincoln Derby 24-Sep-2006 Unsackable Swagbag talks about his Conference winning season, Daryl Clare, and the good old days before he was framed by Graham Bean in this sickeningly sycophantic interview with Press Officer Ralph Gackweed. Edited for legal reasons. Length 0.002 seconds

SUFFER THE CHILDREN
Clutching a tear-stained photo of his fallen hero Steve Evans, ten year old little Bobby Shattocks, wailing and crying with grief, cut a forlorn figure outside the home of Boston United today.

Euro Wembley Magic: 10 years on

BREAKING NEWS: KITMAN STAGES COUP
In stunning scenes, ruthless Boston United kitman Jason Hatfield this evening stepped into the power vacuum created by Steve Evans' and John Blackwell's mysterious 'shopping trip' in London to seize control of the Conference-bound club.

Accrington 3, Boston United 8
Baffled Boston United fans had their Accrington victory celebrations cut short after it emerged they had been watching the WRONG game at Stanley’s impressive InterLink Corrugated Iron Arena™ on Saturday, impsTALK.co.uk can exclusively reveal.

Pilgrims announce new commercial ventures
Non-league bound Boston United have announced a new series of commercial ventures in the forthcoming weeks to try and prop up the club until Christmas at least. The main event is the Stevie E Evening of Fun, to take place on Friday November 17, which will see guests at a dinner in the Pilgrims' Sportsbar entertained by local stand-up and club boss Stevie 'E' Evans.

Shrewsbury 5 Boston 0: The Aftermath
Boston United’s senior players and coaching staff have called upon the Pilgrims to ‘cut out the collective incompetence’ ahead of Wednesday futile trip to ex-Just One League Below The Premiership side Brighton and Hove Albion.

impsTALK editor gets car
impsTALK editor Ralph Gackweed, 154, has taken delivery of a new 1981 Reliant Robin, courtesy of fanzine sponsors Crazee Jimmy's World of Bargains.

Visit BENCHMOVE.CO.UK!
Left homeless and bitter following his unceremonious dismissal from the Official Matchday Magazine last season, local BBC journalist Scott Dalton lives a day-to-day existence, rummaging through bins and back pockets to stay alive on the mean streets of downtown Boston. But Scott has just found out his home, a park bench in Central Park, is due to be removed to make way for a new rubbish bin. Time to up sticks and find new digs.... with BENCHMOVE.CO.UK!

Rodwell launches fleXi ticket eXtreme™
Boston United fashion statement Jim Rodwell is delighted to announce the introduction of the fleXi ticket eXtreme™, a brand new ticketing initiative for Pilgrims fans at the Staffsmart Arena™ ahead of the 2006/2007 season.

Boston unveil Elding. Again.
With season-tickets hitting rock bottom and local interest in the Pilgrims at an all time low, Boston United have acted quickly to sign popular local lad Anthony Elding on a free transfer from Boston United, impsTALK can exclusively reveal.

Desperate Dalton makes comeback bid
Former match-day programme contributer and local journalist Scott Dalton has made one last bid to return to the big time with the launch of a new magazine, From Behind Your Benches, impsTALK can exclusively reveal in today's Exclusive Breaking News Exclusive Update (sponsored by Staffsmart™).

Boston 'doomed' say scientists
It may be a slow news day in the Midlands or a terrifying vision of what the future holds for the town, but either way today’s startling news that Boston could soon be swimming with the fishes has caused shockwaves of the non-saltwater variety at the StaffSmart Mega-Arena (©©©™®®©™™).

Rodwell: We need new haircuts
Boston United’s incoming chairman and part-time style-guru Jim Rodwell has set out his vision for the future of senior football in the town, declaring at a press conference today: “We need new haircuts”.

Evans shares UEFA course with 'household' names
Steve Evans has returned to Boston United today after attending a UEFA 'A' coaching course in Scotland, the official unofficial voice of BUFC, impsTALK, can reveal in Wednesday's exclusive breaking news UPDATE.

I AM the law!
Sinister Lavaflow chairman Jon Sotnick has vowed to sue the person behind last week’s match fixing allegations, impsTALK has learned after picking up a copy of the Boston Standard earlier today.

SOLD! TO THE MAN IN THE GREEN SUIT!
Residents living around Boston United's crumbling stadium reacted with mild apathy today after they discovered that club officials, desperate to increase cash-flow, sold the STREET name to their major sponsors.

EVANS GETS LUNCHIE DETTO ON UEFA COURSE
UEFA officials confirmed to impsTALK today that Steve Evans will be serving a full week’s worth of lunchtime detentions when he returns to complete his ‘A’ coaching badge course with them next week.

Green to sign
Boston United, who play at the Staffsmart Arena™, have captured their fouth journeyman signing of the season with the addition of forgotten Imps man Francis Green.

2006/2007 Features

If Evans....
An occasional feature devoted to imagining our glorious leader as he might be in another profession.

The Lennie Curtis Interview
impsTALK hack Adam Upsall catches up with ex-Pilgrim Lennie Curtis.

Crazee Jimmy's Cabinet of Curiosities and Museum of the Strange
You've HEARD about the legend that is Steve Evans. Now see his legacy with your OWN EYES!! You won't BELIEVE what you see!

Crazee Jimmy's World of Bargains
Boston United chairman Crazee Jimmy brings you the best - for less!!

Embarrassing predictions of our time
Who the HELL would be stupid enough to confidently predict that Grimsby Town, yes, that's Grimsby Town, would finish 06/07 as League Two champions? Er....

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