Green arrives at Staffsmart Arena™
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Evans: 'Green will shine at Staffsmart Arena™'

Boston United, who play at the Staffsmart Arena™, have captured their fouth journeyman signing of the season with the addition of forgotten Imps man Francis Green.

Green arrives at the Staffsmart Arena™ following the earlier signings of Tim Ryan, Anthony Elding and another Doncaster player we can't remember the name of.

Evans told Singleton News Corp (Inc) in Thursday's breaking news update: "Bringing Green to the Staffsmart Arena™ is the biggest ever signing for Boston United. He wowed the Staffsmart Arena™ crowd on loan earlier in the year and I've no doubt he's going to wow the Staffsmart Arena™ crowd in 2006/2007."

Jim Rodwell, working a tub of Fudge into his hair, said he was 'delighted' to have brought the striker to the Staffsmart Arena™.

"I was on set modelling the new Superdry range for Hooker magazine when Keith rang me," Rodwell said, bleaching his teeth and waxing his crack. "He said something to the effect of he'd rather have an crocked Yeo up front than a fully fit Green and would we please, for the love of God, take him away? So naturally, given Keith is such a close friend of Steve's, I signed him up and brought him over to the Staffsmart Arena™™™."

Important Staffsmart Arena™ season-ticket holder Bob Mugfret-Fishhead said: "I can't remember a single thing about Green from his earlier spell with us. I hope he lasts a bit longer than Ben Futcher, though I won't hold my breath."

Alfreton Town are already excitedly anticipating Green's arrival on a loan deal before Christmas.

Sinister Lavaflow CEO Jon Sotnick said: 'If we're going to continue bringing in players of Franny's quality, we need a new Staffsmart Arena™.'