EVANS SHARES UEFA COURSE WITH HOUSEHOLD NAMES
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Above headline serves only to remind everyone that Evans not even close to being household name

Steve Evans has returned to Boston United today after attending a UEFA 'A' coaching course in Scotland, the official unofficial voice of BUFC, impsTALK, can reveal in Wednesday's exclusive breaking news UPDATE. Evans spent twelve days in his native land learning the intricacies of football coaching, picking up a number of revolutionary techniques he fully intends to employ at the SmartMonoRail Mega-Dome™.

Overweight, cocaine snorting cheat

Evans exclusively told impsTALK: “It turns out you can make up to three substitutes per game, which I didn’t realise before. What else… You shouldn’t use disappearing ink on player contracts. I’d never heard of ‘wingers’ before either. Someone told me I had two of them of Boston last season, which was news to me.”

Aside from learning about how to train players by methods other than five-a-side matches, Evans also found himself rubbing shoulders with the great and good while on the course. The Scot drove to the course in a car, noting that footballing legends Johan Cruyff and Diego Maradona also own cars.

Evans also drank several litres of water – a drink often enjoyed by no less than the current England squad and their management team. On the training field he wore his trusty Adidas Copa Mundial boots – dating back to his days as a Manchester United and Celtic regular – the same boots made famous by Franz Beckenbauer and Gerd Muller.

impsTALK can also reveal that while travelling home, Evans listened to the radio - using the same basic technology used by Pele whenever he listen to the radio!

Sinister Lavaflow frontman DJ Sotnixx paid tribute to his little Scottish munchkin, noting: “Mark Isaac is a p-p-p-p-prick, yo yo, word up home boyz."

"Woodyz gonna sort dat chancer, yo yo, gimme some love, Colin Wo - to the O to the D - ker-shizzle, fuck me - I is da shit,” Sotnixx added.