impsTALK.co.uk >> 2008/09 >> Rough
Guide > Kendal Town
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the hell are Kendal City?
back in an old issue of From behind Your Fences, Richard O. Smith
scribbles of the perennial confusion caused by the presence of Netherfield
train station on the Boston-Nottingham railway line.
Confusing, because the Netherfield that Boston United faced in league
football was absolutely nothing to do with that most convenient of
stop-offs. It was actually in Cumbria. Fucking Cumbria!
what happened to Netherfield? No? Fair enough. But we’re going
to tell you anyway. Kendal Town ARE Netherfield. Well, they used
to be. The club was formed in 1919 by the employees of a local shoe
factory, playing on a spot of land near their factory that they
have retained to this day. The club played in local leagues before
it joined the Lancashire Combination in 1945.
Over the next
few decades, the club made its name as something of an FA Cup scrapper
in the Yeovil/Dagenhem vein, making several Football League clubs
sweat. In the early 60s, Kendal striker Tom Brownlee tonked home
76 goals in a single season – a record that sounds impressive
until you consider the 106 goals Alexandros Papadopolous scored
for Macclesfield Town as he fired them to 2012/13 Champions League
glory on red disc Champ in impsTALK’s bedroom four years ago.
club changed its name to ‘Netherfield Kendal’ in 1998
and then to ‘Kendal Town’ in 2000. The newly-named club
finally secured promotion to the Northern Premier League after defeating
Gresley Rovers in the playoffs two years ago. Gresley. Now there’s
a blast from the past. What the HELL happened to Gresley Rovers?
have few claims to fame, but perhaps the most impressive is the record
they share with Bridlington Trinity for the highest number of replays
of a cup tie – an astronomical seven. That’s seven entire
games, two teams almost literally fighting to insolvency for the right
to play in, ah, the second round of the 1980 FA Trophy.
official history records that the sheer number of games cost both
clubs dearly in terms of finances. The 62p prize money Kendal eventually
pocketed for winning through to the next round after over thirteen
stultifying hours of play didn’t quite cover their outgoings,
The other claim
to fame is more of a Gerald Ratner-esque catastrophic error of judgement.
Kendal, in a decision they would come to regret, once turned down
Sir Tom Finney in his playing days, presumably in much the same
way EMI ‘turned down’ the Beatles in the early 60s.
website quite dramatically labels this as ‘perhaps one the
worst mistakes in football’, although with competition in
the guise of Newcastle’s signing of Titus Bramble and Boston
United’s appointment of Steve Evans as manager in 1998, we’re
not so sure. Luckily, Sir Tom bears no grudges and he agreed to
become club president in 2007.
Where do they keep getting caught offside?
Kendal owt like Wukky, like?
to Cumbria tend not to be happy occasions for travelling Pilgrims.
If it’s not dangerous working mens’ clubs in Workington,
it’s deranged Barrow fans seeking retribution for the existence
of Paul Bastock.
And if it’s not deranged Barrow fans seeking retribution for
the existence of Paul Bastock, it’s mullerings at the hands
of Carlisle that prompt anomalous betting patterns amongst gangster
chummies in South East Asia.
But fear not.
Kendal is not Barrow. It is not Carlisle. And, most importantly,
Kendal is not Workington - and for that we must offer effusive thanks
to some higher force. The town is actually quite the opposite; a
small market town that sits in one of the most picturesque locations
Boston fans will visit this season.
to the Lakes’, as Kendal is known, actually sits just outside
the boundary of the national park but is, nevertheless, an attraction
in its own right. As well as the market, the town is an ideal base
for tourists hell-bent on tramping up sodden hills in force nine
gales and horizontal summer sleet.
Kendal is perhaps
best known for the chocolate coated mint cake that bears his name,
a high energy confectionary treat that has assumed legendary status
because of its use by intrepid mountaineers. Kendal mint cake has
kept alive climbers scaling Everest, K2, Mount Cook – and
the Frickley slag heap.
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